I just finished reading the comments on another blog, and every single person responded with one of two answers - either "I have totally been there, I feel your pain" or "Don't worry, honey! I know the right person is just around the corner!" Other variations include "I had to wait a long time for the perfect man, but then I found him!" or "I've got a great guy, and I know that someday you will too."

I'm getting really tired of being assured that things will work out for me because they worked out for someone else. It strikes me as incredibly naive to think that there is one person out there for everyone. My belief in soulmates is limited to movies and books - I don't think that "my other half" is out there waiting for me to bump into him. I do think that someday I might meet the person I am going to marry, but if I don't...my life won't end. I won't spend the rest of my existence walking around, being only half of a person. I am a whole person right now. I don't want to be completed, and I don't want to have to complete anyone else.

Yes, I would like to have a partner - someone to work and play with, someone to share the same memories and stories with me. I suppose that is why I am so picky, and scared of being in a relationship. I'm afraid of being too caught up, or of losing who I am to someone else. I like who I am, and although I am willing to change with someone else, I'm not willing to change for them. And I don't expect someone else to change for me. I don't want to date someone that I can't see a future with, but I am also scared to start down that road when/if I do find someone.

If the perfect man is waiting just around the corner for me, I will probably walk right on by because I have no interest in perfection. Nor am I, in any way, perfect. I think I am over the stage in my life of sitting in a bar desperately hoping that the right guy will come in and notice me. It's not going to happen, and I want to quit putting my life on hold hoping that it does. I have plans, and although I don't really have everything figured out for my life, I know that I need to do a few things that don't include settling down, having kids, and working at a job that doesn't challenge me.

I'm glad that it worked out for you, but it may not for me. I'm learning to be okay with that, and I wish the rest of the world would try to do the same.